Post-match: Millwall

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Millwall

 

 

DEM 90 MINUTES CONTINUED…The moment was as glorious as it was fleeting. Before the celebrations had begun to die down, the Lie-Ins equalised. None of DEM BLADES back three took responsibility for a long punt forward and allowed Steve Morrison to tap home a volley. Like campers in the rain, the remaining moments were was intense. Blackman made some excellent saves as did the opposition keeper Jordan Archer – unfortunately, DEM BLADES could not hit the bullseye.  Like campers in general, the whole affair ended in mild disappointment. 1-1 final score.

Man of the Match

Unlike ‘t stoners ont’ back of’t kop, Paul Coutts is out of’t pot.

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BOLD TEXT VERSION

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ITK: Brooks to Milan

A source at the club, who have asked for their identity to be protected has confirmed that David Brooks has set his sights on Milan. Alan Knill also revealed that Grimsby is on the Welsh International’s radar, as he plans a relaxing summer holiday with friends. Brooks, who turns 21 in July, is said to have his heart set on the Northern Seaside town, should his travel agent fail to deliver on his dream journey to Italy’s fashion capital.

DEM OPPOSITION

Millwall are the dodecahedrons of the Championship. They win a lot of corners and, resultantly, have gained a lot of points. So strong is their set-piece play that the Lie-Ins refuse to play football in between dead-ball situations. Ugly? Certainly. But it makes you wonder what might be if DEM BLADES had this threat?

DEM 90 MINUTES

La Liga’s early kick-off began with a whistle, chanting on KOP and orchestrated humming in the away end, known as the Lie-Ins Yawn. The game was finely balanced from the off. Millwall made up for what they lacked in skill, with brute force.

DEM BLADES made up for what they lacked in brute force, with John Fleck.  Despite possessing more quality, DEM BLADES only mustered a couple of chances in the first half. The best falling to Lee Evans; the keeper sweated on his long-range strike but managed to tip the effort around the post. Millwall had their chances. They looked dangerous from every set-play, but the first half ended level.

The second half began with a substitution – Duffy on, Lundstram off – and increasingly, where DEM BLADES were committed to keeping the ball, Millwall were not. After a couple of squandered chances, the opener arrived. Billy Sharp had just missed a sitter when Lee Evans crossed from the inside left channel, where Jack O’Connell was waiting. With complete disregard for his magic hat, he headed the ball across the face of goal for Johnny-on-the-spot, Leon Clarke to nod home on the six-yard line.

The moment was as glorious as it was fleeting. Before the celebrations had begun to die down, the Lie-Ins equalised. None of DEM BLADES back three took responsibility for a long punt forward and allowed Steve Morrison to tap home a volley.

Like campers in the rain, the remaining moments were was intense. Blackman made some excellent saves as did the opposition keeper Jordan Archer – unfortunately, DEM BLADES could not hit the bullseye.  Like campers in general, the whole affair ended in mild disappointment. 1-1 final score.

 

DEM BLADES

A Killer is out there…

Yesterday afternoon, the streets outside Bramall Lane were abuzz as news spread of the return of a killer. One season ticket holder described the situation as “terrifying.” Who is this killer and why are they stalking the streets and minds of DEM BLADES? Those brave enough to speak to me did so in whispers and the Cremorne. I bought a bloke a pint in exchange for information and he confirmed my suspicions, “now, I’ll tell you this for free, it’s Hope that kills you.”

Man of the Match

Unlike ‘t stoners ont’ back of’t kop, Paul Coutts is out of’t pot.

 

 

 

 

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